Tom Sawyer the Vampire Slayer
by liberator of captured angels
Summary: What if Tom had originally been sent into the League to seduce Mina? Would things have turned out differently? Curious to find out? No? Want to anyway? No? Of course you do! No? Well, make Shane West happy, and do it anyway. Review as well.
1. Tom's Assignment

**Disclaimer: **Don't own LXG (watch me sob!), don't own Tom, who's in the story, Dorian, who's mentioned, or Quatermain, who's mentioned briefly, but not named. The boss person's mine, but I don't really care about him.

Although I don't technically own Shane West, I do in my mind.

**A.N:** Don't shoot me if the characters are OOC, I haven't read any of the books except The Picture of Dorian Gray, and I've seen the film of Dracula (not that that really counts.) I will read the Adventures of Tom Sawyer (someday), but for now I'll just have to make do with a second rate story.

Tom Sawyer the Vampire Slayer

"Ah....Mr Sawyer, I see you've decided to grace me with your presence," a voice came forth from the gloom of Tom's unlit 'bachelor pad'; his boss.

Working in the secret service, meant that Tom _should_ be prepared at all times for a meeting. But no one could blame him for thinking that a meeting his _own home_ was a little strange.

"_Surprised _Mr Sawyer?" his superior observed, "I should think that a _secret agent_ would learn to expect the unexpected, at _all_ times."

"Uh..... Hey sir," Tom said hastily, trying to cover up for his initial shock, which had (clearly) not gone unnoticed by his superior, "Yeah, sir, but isn't the office normally a better place to talk?"

"Indeed. In normal circumstances the office is the most secure place to meet. However, the mission I'm about to assign you is such a delicate matter, that I fear it could be jeopardised if it were to be overheard."

"And....what might that mission be?" Sawyer asked, his trademark smile showing his peaked interest.

His superior gave a sinister smile of his own.

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"Come _on_ Sawyer, think," the handsome spy muttered decisively to himself. "How do you kill a _vampire_? I mean, they're _already_ dead, for crying out loud." Unfortunately, he cried out that last part, causing alarmed passers by to stare. He pulled his hat further down to cover his face, and hurriedly walked on.

America had gotten wind of the plot for the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. The whole thing was meant to be a set up, and an immortal was supposed to collect the powers of the League to create weapons for the Fantom, in an attempt to start a world war. The League was: a hunter, a pirate, a vampiric chemist, an invisible man, and the last two were not yet accounted for. Naturally, the vampire was the immortal, and so had to be the traitor.

_One boat trip later..._

Tom watched as the League left the house of the self-named 'M.' He followed, and ended up outside the house of the beautiful Dorian Gray (**A.N**. by the way, that's from **me** not Tom, just in case you were wondering about his sexual orientation.). As the League entered the house, Tom noticed a crowd of men dressed in black. As they entered at the back of the house, Tom noticed one clearly inexperienced participant leaning against a wall, trying to catch his breath. Tom easily sneaked up behind him, lifted his helmet, and smashed it down on the man's head.

"Hey, mind if I borrow this?" he asked as the man sank to the floor, unconscious. In a few seconds, Tom had the man's uniform on, and entered the building.

He took his place in Gray's library, and winked at the old man who was leader of the League.

_Well? _What did everyone think? Remember, everyone who reviews gets Shane West as a prize!


	2. New Revelations

**Disclaimer**: LXG's not mine, never will be, none of the characters are mine, and so on, but feel free to pay me if you like.

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Now, to my faithful reviewers:

**Cecily Marla Smith:** Yeah, I probably should have stretched it out a bit more, but it was done on the spur of the moment, and I haven't had much time. Hopefully I'll be able to think the rest of it through more clearly though. Thanks for the tip about anonymous reviewers, I actually didn't know that I didn't let them review, but I've changed my settings now. Thanks for being the first reviewer! :)

**Leah Tracy: **Something tells me you only reviewed for the prize.....not that I blame you.....

**Tonianne: **That is so nice! I like you! Hope you like the next instalment as much.

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Okay, I think it's time to warn you now that I'm really bad at describing fights. And there's going to be a lot of fighting in this upcoming part, as anyone who has seen the movie knows. But bear with me, this whole story won't be about fighting, although I do understand that I will have to include more later on. I just hope you won't hate me _too _much.....

.....and yes, I know Tom should notice there's something wrong when Dorian turns out to be an immortal, but if you think about it, Tom I _wouldn't_ have seen Dorian being shot, as he was chacing the Fantom at the time. God I love loopholes!

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Well, now that's done, on with the show.

Tom Sawyer the Vampire Slayer

Tom waited, his Winchester trained on Quatermaine, while the Fantom continued with his little speech. He was waiting for the opportune moment to strike. This guy really liked the sound of his own voice (**a.n./**get it? He's M!).

The Fantom kicked away Quatermain's relinquished weapon.

"_If you're looking for the opportune moment,_" Tom thought to himself, "_this is it._"

He shot at one of the colleagues of the unfortunate man he had left outside. Before long, there was a frenzy of shooting, a furious battle between good and evil had begun.....

Even in Tom's own head, that sounded melodramatic. It was a really exhilarating fight though. There was something to be said for firing a gun; it really brought one a sense of empowerment....

.....Perhaps when this was all over, he might need some help. He was sounding crazier by the minute.

Tom marvelled at how he could think of such things whilst in the midst of all this chaos, while still battling bravely on. He guessed that he'd always be able to have his little reflections, no matter what was happening.

All thoughts of his own insanity were forgotten, however, when he was suddenly bombarded with attacks from the Fantom's henchmen. He guessed that was what happened when people found out that you had infiltrated their group to stop them from completing their mission.

Some people were just touchy!

When he ran out of bullets and had to reload, Tom realised that he could save a lot more bullets for the Fantom if he just started using his gun to fend off his attackers rather than firing it. He promptly started to do so, and found that he could manage just as well by using his gun as a truncheon.

His mind snapped back to his original task as he saw the Fantom escaping through the roof. He soon gave chase, but a mixture of the Fantom's head start and Tom's poor aim meant that the Fantom managed to escape.

"Damn," Tom muttered.

As Tom returned to the League, he found one of the Fantom's henchmen with a knife to the female member's throat. He soon trained his gun on the man, not that he thought he should fire it. His aim had been rather off lately.

Not to worry, though, as the rest of the League seemed to have exactly the same idea.

"Shoot," the cocky henchman dared them, "Go on!"

The rest of the league returned their weapons to their proper stations, including Tom.

"I guessed as much.....that they would do anything to protect you."

The woman wasn't fazed, however.

"See now, that's your biggest mistake," she told him, her hand slowly reaching for his knife, "Thinking that I need them to protect me."

She suddenly turned around, grabbed his neck in her hands and tore at his throat with her teeth.

"Whoa," Tom thought, "she's a _vampire_. They never mentioned this in the guidebook."

A sudden thought struck him.

"Wait a minute. _She's _the immortal!"

How was he going stop _her?_

_To be continued_......

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**A.N** I toyed with the idea of making this chapter longer, but I didn't think it'd work out. I'm going to put the rest on to another chapter, and hopefully it'll be much longer.

I didn't realise until I looked back over the first chapter, but I notice that I actually mentioned that Tom knew about there being a vampire in the League, but in this chapter he's surprised. Please just ignore it, 'cause it works well the way it is, so I don't really want to change it. Thank you for your co-operation! :)

I'm not really happy with how this chapter turned out, but I'm just glad I got it out of the way.

I'm getting desperate for more reviews, so I'm throwing in Stuart Townsend along with Shane West.

While I accept flamers, anyone who sends in one that isn't constructive criticism gets Hyde. And I'm **not** talking about Jason Flemyng!


	3. Introductions Made

Sorry I couldn't update sooner! I actually had this all written out, but I wanted to wait until I had the next chapter typed up before I updated, but unfortunately, it didn't work out. Maybe by the time I get this posted I'll have started writing it.

Thanks for being patient, and I hope y'all enjoy this chapter!

**Disclaimer:** LXG belongs to Alan Moore, Kevin O'Neill, and a shit load of other people I can't be bothered mentioning. If you still want to sue me, go ahead. I'm poor.

To everyone who has reviewed this story so far, I thank you. Anyone who hasn't should be very ashamed. Don't worry too much though, there's still time. Not much though. Hurry up.

But if you flame, I'll write a sternly worded letter to your parents.

**Sawyer Fan:** Thank you! I kind of used the film as a guide for the fight scene, 'cause I really do suck at it. It was never really _that _important, because this story isn't really about that, but the film is, so I'll have to stick to that for a while. Glad you appreciated the humour I used from time to time!

**Marcus Lazarus: **The story's really more about how everyone would react to finding out the reason behind Tom joining the League, rather than any real romance story. Although, you never know, their relationship will be quite crucial to the plot as well, so we'll just have to see what happens. By the way, I _think_ this chapter's longer, but you can never tell until you post it.

**Cecily Marla Smith: **Thank you for thesuggestion, I never thought of that. Thanks for the compliment about the fight scene, but as I've already admitted before, I was watching the film when I wrote that.

**Wind-Sorceress-Pluto**Glad you liked it......it's nice to get the recognition I deserve (not that I actually really deserve it, but whatever. Let's just keep pretending I do.)

Okay people, there's some cursing in this one – sorry if anyone gets offended. I've got an excuse though.thinks up an excuse....umm....it was writer's block. Yeah. That's it.

**Tom Sawyer the Vampire Slayer**

"Uhh.....think fast, Sawyer," Tom told himself.

"Boy. They told me European women had funny ways," he said aloud.

"Okay, I'm officially a loser," he thought.

Noticing that the vampire had a spot of blood around her mouth, he helpfully pointed it out.

"You missed a spot," he informed her, helpfully indicating exactly where it was.

"Excuse me," she replied. "And you are?"

"Special Agent Tom Sawyer. Of the American Secret Service," he replied, not unaware of the suspicion laced in with her words.

"Then America is aware of the problem?" the old man asked.

"No shit, Sherlock,_" _Tom thought to himself, but to Quatermain, he replied, "If a war starts in Europe, how long will it take until crosses the Atlantic?"

Seeing the look of deep mistrust from the vampire, he wondered how he was going to get round that little setback. Nevertheless, he plunged on bravely.

"I followed you. I knocked out a straggler, and took his place."

"Very noble," Mr Gray told him, "but this is a private party, and _you're _not invited."

"Shit," thought Tom.

"Actually," the vampire interjected, "Dorian has declined. So we _are _one shy of a full deck."

"Okay, she might _ not_ object to me so much. That's good," the ever optimistic Tom thought.

Dorian would not be dismissed quite so easily, however.

"On the contrary," he replied, "the battle was just the spur I needed."

With a look at the lady, he added "That and the thrill of a friendship renewed."

"Oh great they have a _history_. Now I'll _never_ get in."

He looked to each member of the League in turn. Except for that one guy, who'd disappeared. ((**A.N) **okay, I know Skinner had his make up andclothes on before this, but I couldn't resist putting that in.)

He had luck with Quatermain. He noticed him eyeing up his Winchester, and feeling an opportunity for entering the League, he passed over the rifle, praising the Lord for sending him Quatermain.

"Winchester." Quatermain told Tom, he didn't ask.

"That's right," Tom replied, praying to any God he could think of, that he could make a good impression on the old man.

"It's modified," he offered, "American style."

"American style shooting, too."

Hoping this was a joke, Tom smiled.

"Well, whatever it takes."

Hope began to course through his body.

"You like it?" he boldly began, "I brought two."

It was clearly a stroke of genius.

"You're in."

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The strange guy with the pale face had re-appeared (**A.N**/ Not really! Get it? He's invisible!). He asked Captain Nemo where they were going.

Nemo replied "Paris."

"Ooh," thought Tom. "The city of love. Good place to get close to the lady."

He had already decided how he was going to suss out the immortal. He was going to seduce her.

After all, he'd never had any trouble in _that _department before, had he?

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Nemo soon got pretty pissed off at him for calling his....._thing_ a boat. Of course, he didn't _show _that he was pissed. He stuck Tom as quite a stoic person.

Even Tom had to agree, it was pretty impressive. No boat he had ever seen surpassed it. And the fact that it travelled _under_ water as well......

But he couldn't shake the thought that it looked like a canoe. Granted, a very big, spacious, impressive looking canoe......but a canoe nonetheless.

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(**A.N**/) Should I stop here? It seems as good a place as any.

Remember, each time you review, Shane West gets another film deal!

Probably.


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